Stuck with what it is...

Slept for beans last night, and finally got up because I couldn’t breathe lying down. This cold’s as bad as the last one. Can only hope it ends sooner.

Closer and closer on the revisions. Just wish my head was clearer, so I could make a better evaluation of them. Regardless, looks as though I’ll have a reader copy in a day or two.

Boys came over for a mid-afternoon visit while the house was shown. Had a nice time with them. They’re both down with colds, too—no surprise there—but in pretty good good spirits even so.

Not sure what to think anymore, except not to think about anything I can’t control. Come Friday, the world will start making its own rules. Until then, we’ve got what we’ve got. Each other, and nothing else.

So...

Up at 4:00 and never managed to get back to sleep. No surprise, I guess. Hit the keyboard around 5:30, but came up short of where I wanted to be with the revisions. Maybe tomorrow.

Think maybe I picked up J’s cold. Not feeling very well. Gonna try and bed down earlier tonight. See if I can’t get ahead of things this time.

More later.

Doldrums...

Another early rise.

Warm this morning, and muggy. Looking out the cottage window at rain right now, so it was all day in the brewing. Wish the grass would make a comeback, but too much damage may have been done earlier in the month. Might have to have another fall seeding.

Other things to worry about at the moment.

Happy it’s Friday.

Taking inventory...

Long day for sure.

Up early (yeah, it’s staying darker, later) for an hour or so at the keyboard, then spent rest of the day goofing off with Matty.

He was a real sweet pea today. Great mood. He’s developed a strange interest in the Titanic over the past few weeks, and likes to run through the details of its sinking at length. Not sure what the fascination is, but he’s an intent little student.

Didn’t make it to the gym today. Stayed home instead to work on the long piece. I’m thinking, maybe, when the reader copies are out and the boys are gone, I’ll dust off my belly-boat again and hit Catamount Lake with my fly rod. Be fun to spend the day floating around. Doing nothing.

Party in the park after school tomorrow. Jackie’s last hurrah. Monday, Matty’s birthday. Friday…many farewells.

A bit of this, and a bit of that...

Got a nice note from my buddy, G, this morning. He’s on some island in BC pitching a new series. Concept is top drawer. Hope he has the luck with it he deserves.

Spent the morning running back through the last round of revisions on the long piece, and found remarkably little to hate. Hope the luck continues on that way. If it does, I may be burning a few reader copies come the weekend.

Official word came in today. Boys are shipping out next Friday morning. Jack’s going away party is in the park on Friday, Matty’s birthday is Monday, and the rest will be what it will be.

Looking at next Saturday as departure time for Wyoming. Gonna be a brief visit this time, mostly for repairs, but the drive will be good given everything else going on.

Nothing new under the sun...

Young M and I have bonded on a new level. Turns out his true vocation is construction. Woke early and wrote for an hour or two, then retired to the garage with him where we drilled, sawed, hammered, pulled staples, set screws and removed bolts with a crescent wrench—an operation that consumed much of the morning.

Stuck around the house all day, but managed to get off the last of my N critiques in the process. So I’m home free for a while, and with any luck unencumbered enough to move closer to the end of the long piece.

Took the baby for a wagon ride around one. Weather was hot, but tolerable in the shade. Haven’t been out of the house since.

Not sure where the days are going, but they’re piling up fast. Look forward to getting back to they gym tomorrow and maybe getting a haircut afterward. Something different.

Need to find my way into some new stories. A new novel, maybe. Can’t seem to find as much time to read as I’d like, and been too tired to do much at night, either, when I go to bed. Hot weather’s made me lazy.

Up, down, up down...

Screwball Monday.

Mornings are definitely getting darker, but this one happened to be warm. Thought maybe I was going to be looking at an early rain, but not so. Worked a couple of hours, then drank a couple of cups and went off to the see the dentist for a teeth cleaning.

Read the new essay from N when I got back, wrote a quick critique and wandered off to the gym. Can’t say I pushed things—felt tired for some reason—but did enough to get by. Working through a new bout of the blues, I guess.

Worked a little more when I got home, then went off to Stanley’s to free the pickup. Turns out the window motor isn’t broken. Or at least not broken enough to replace. The mechanic monkeyed with it and got it to roll up, and that’s where it’s going to stay until hell freezes over. Or I do.

Young M. tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing him.

Meantime, lots of niggling paperwork to try and get out of my hair. Guess I’ll have to shoot for another early rise.

Sunday...

Big day.

Boys came over yesterday afternoon and spent the night. Hamburgers and watermelon for dinner, roasted marshmallows for dessert. Mattie’s first fire, Jack’s second or third. Great time all around.

Up early with Jack. Bug hunting, followed by pancakes, and sausages. Took them canoeing on Quail Lake after breakfast. Again, Mattie’s first time. Beautiful day, beautiful time all the way. Boys were great the whole time. Took them home after lunch, and got big hugs from both. Big hugs.

Took a quick nap after the boys left. Went out and did some construction.

Good thing it's Friday...

Woke just after midnight last night, and never quite got back to sleep. Some of it aches from working out, the rest from thinking about the boys. Still, put in a long solid day of editing, and while I'd didn’t get as much accomplished as I’d have liked, did okay. Would have gotten the lawns mowed, too, but for a giant toad strangler that came along late afternoon soaking everything.

In keeping with the tragic nature of the month, the back window on the pickup’s decided not to work. Wait. Lemme revise that. It rolls down, but refuses to roll up. Discovered this during the aforementioned toad strangler. Duck taped a garbage bag to it as a temporary fix, but can’t get it into the shop until Monday. Suppose it’s better it happened now than up on the Bighorns.

Had a good day at the gym. Light, compared to yesterday, but nice. Afterward, came home and went back to work. Got a new piece from N to look at. An essay. That should be fun.

Boys coming for a sleep over tomorrow. Gonna take them out in the canoe Sunday morning. Have an old CD of Danny Kaye stories I’m gonna spring on them at bedtime, providing I can find something to play them on.

Have this picture of Mattie in my head. He’s holding my drill, looking at the sawhorse. Knowing he’s only allowed to use the drill on appropriate materials, he points to the sawhorse’s leg. Says, casually, “Is that wood?” Earlier, in the kitchen, a butcher’s pinking shears in hand, he was seen to look up innocently and ask, “Got a chicken?”

Everything's getting close...

Up early, but not as early as I thought. The days are getting shorter. Woke at 5:30 but would have sworn it was half an hour earlier, judging from the light. Anyway, at the keyboard early.

Worked well until 7:30, then sat out on the front porch having a cup of coffee and watching the hawks play. Young M came late, but in a happy mood. We messed around in the garage a while discussing power tools, then went off grocery shopping. Had a nice time all day.

Jack was very sweet, too. Said he had a “good idea,” and why didn’t we move to Pittsburgh, too. Man. These next couple of weeks are gonna rip our hearts out.

Just need to keep our eyes forward and do what we can do.

One N story left in the queue. Gonna have to read it one more time before making up my mind to push it forward. A lot to admire about it, but one or two jarring bumps I’ve had a difficult time making my way around.

Raining. Big storm moved in fast at day’s end. Wonder what it’s like in Wyoming.

Midweek hodgepodge...

Pretty even day. Up early to work, then on with the rest. Still noodling with the long piece. Making last minute repairs to the errors, inconsistencies, etc., that turned up in last week’s read. All in all, not much more to mess with before making reader copies. We’ll see how quickly it moves from here.

Read another of the N stories. Nonfiction. Wrote my critique and sent if off before noon.

Good day at the gym. Got back early and drove the toxic stuff from the garage out to the hazardous disposal site on the east side of town. Hit Lowes on the way home and picked up a couple of extra hooks to hang the last of the gear.

Hot day. Grass is looking weak despite constant watering. Be happy to see some cool weather move in.

Boys back tomorrow. We’ll see what the day brings. Might have to fill the pool for an end of day swim.

Gave Mom a call to see how she’s doing, but no answer. Probably sitting in front of the TV, watching tonight’s debate.

Steady, steady...

Here’s one that slipped by.

Up early making revisions, then off to Lowe’s and Costco to pick up shelves and water. Got back and installed the shelf in the garage with Mattie’s help. Showed him how to use the cordless drill, and pulled a video of him drilling holes in a piece of scrap. The kid loves anything mechanical.

Busy client day, so no gym. Hate playing catchup, but sometimes that’s just the way it goes. Besides, was still sore and tired from yesterday, so maybe it was a good thing.

Looking at another cloudy sky that’s having a hard time deciding whether it wants to rain. Humidity was down today, which was nice, but I’d welcome an evening shower to cool things off.

Need to finish up with the N pieces. One of them keeps speaking to me. It isn’t perfect but, you know what? I think I’m going to let someone else be the judge. Have the feeling more will be coming in soon, and want to have my queue ready.

Had a nice time with Jackie this afternoon, playing trains. Gonna miss that kid.

A Random thought for a random universe...

Back at it.

Good morning at the keyboard. Feel like I’m getting back into the swing. Revisions to the long piece are pretty well in hand, and I’m looking to put a reader copy out the door sometime soon. Get to work on the outline, synopsis, and query.

Good day back at the gym. Thought it might be tough after a four day break, but actually felt pretty good. Looking to get back in the swing this week and make up lost ground.

Garage is a day away from being clean, providing I can hang another shelf and jettison the old wood I’ve been saving. Nice to have things in their place.

Need to make a trip out to the toxic disposal dump before the week’s finished, and another trip to the Arc. Meanwhile, the projects go on. Gotta cut some stabilizers for the cabin door, make a new flue cover, and cobble together some shelves for the shed. After that, fashion a leg for the new pot planter stand from some of the scrap teak. After that, who knows.

Another story, maybe?

Oh, my Grace I've got no hiding place...

Finished the read on the long piece this morning. A lot to think about before sitting down to revise again. Story seems to be in place, but there are niggling little things that still need cleaning up.

Abandoned ship before noon and went on another cleaning binge of the garage. Got a lot accomplished, but still haven’t finished. Organization is mostly complete, but a few details need to be addressed. Worked through the afternoon until after four, then went off to Office Depot in search of file cabinets.

Can’t say it was much of a weekend, but happy to know a lot of things that’ve been out of kilter for a long long time are now coming together.

Mowed the lawns.

Bought some groceries.

Ready to hang it up until tomorrow.

Just trying to figure it out...

So. Woke to the muffled drumming of artillery last night. Then the sound of someone mumbling gibberish. Got up to piss and heard strange talk coming from the guest room.

Knocked, went in and found my mom sitting on the edge of the bed, mumbling “b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b”  Thought she was having a stroke. She asked me if there were “girls in the room,” which further enforced the idea she was dying. This is at 3am. What a night.

A hook and ladder showed up three minutes later, and a van full of EMTs. It was some sort of diabetic episode brought on by any number of things that were not insulin-related. Great month, in all.

Back on our own tomorrow. Time to regroup. Some day I’ll make sense of all this, but not tonight. Tonight I’m just gonna put my head on a pillow and try and find some peace. Wake up and write. Or wake up and hope to write.

Breathe in, breathe out...

Figure this will go down as a milepost. Boys spent the day with us, and expect it will be the last time they ever see their great grandmother.

On the positive side, we all had a nice, really nice time. Jack and Mattie made breakfast for her, and engaged with her all through the day. Took them all up to the North Pole. Rode the rides, ate cheeseburgers. The whole nine yards.

Not sure where things will go from here except to say it probably won’t come clear until they pull out of town.

Taking mom on a picnic tomorrow at Lake Manitou. Canoe a bit. Should be a fun time.

Take these stripes from off my shoulders...

7:30 already. Don’t know where the day went.

Little Mattie was sweet today, but crabby. I wonder if he isn’t coming down with something. Hope not. Gramma Bobbie comes tomorrow, and we’ve got a trip to the North Pole planned for Thursday. Last shot she’ll have at seeing them for a long time—maybe ever.

Got some good revisions in this morning. Didn’t have a long time to write, but made the most of what was there. Came up with a new short, too. In my head, anyway.

Days ahead will be tangled, but maybe that's a good thing. Sure had a nice time with Jackie this afternoon. I’m gonna miss that kid. Him and his little brother both. Will have to wait for things to flatten before knowing what the next move is, but I’m okay with that. It’s the not-knowing that’s driving me nuts.

Strange day, all in all.

Strange day.

Need to get my head together, read and critique the new N stories that’ve come in.

Still kicking...

Up early researching a new story. Or stories. We’ll see what comes. Finished the reader draft of the new short piece yesterday. Working title: X.

Recorded more of the long piece after coffee, coming within fifty pages of the end. Been instructive, for sure, to take it through the process. Eager to get it behind me and begin shaping the outline and synopsis. Get it into the hands of a couple of people I trust.

Put away the keyboard around eleven and went back to work on the garage. Took a trip to the hardware store to pick up chain, got the canoe hung and stowed a little while later. Storage system seems to work pretty well. Good to see the garage and shed begin to look ordered again. Next up, shelving. Like to see everything in order before the weekend, though that may be a bit ambitious with Mom and the boys around.

Days have been something of a blur. Guessing it’s going to be that way a while. Look forward to seeing Mattie tomorrow. Won’t have many more times alone with him before long and want to savor them.

Good day at the gym.

Good day all around, considering.

Sunday evening coming down...

Everything cooled off after the big rain last night. Still didn’t sleep very well, but laying awake in with temps in the 60s wasn’t all that bad.

An early rise. Finished the reader draft of the new story, then read from the long piece after a couple of cups of coffee. Spend the afternoon working on the garage. Progress was slow but good. Managed to get the canoe in by days end, but haven’t quite perfected how to hang it. Gotta make sure it isn’t too high, but at the same time leave plenty of room for the Jeep.

Jettisoned the bookcase we bought from Borders after it went bankrupt, and can’t say it wasn’t a pleasure to say goodbye to. Once the paperbacks were put into storage, all it did was collect dust. Now we’re back to basics. Clothbound editions only.

The weekend turned out to be a blur for the most part, so maybe it’s good the new week is starting. Guess we’ll see.